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What can I say? I'm the world's first fully functioning homicidal artist.

He didn't even start until he was, what, 40, right?

I'm pretty conservative, but the Confederate flag is not the hill I'm going to die on. It's no different than waving a Soviet flag in my book. Good riddance.

Yes, in his 50s.

To be fair, Gordon started eight years earlier and is four years older. But yeah, of course they wanna see him gone. He keeps kicking the asses of the young guns!

A blind prostitute I was with told me I had the biggest dick she ever felt. But I knew she was just pulling my leg.

Has any other driver peaked in their late 30s, early 40s like this? I guess Truex but he didn't have a decent ride before Furniture Row got it together.

Well, if I'm going to have a bad race, it's a good thing BushBrothers has a worse one.

Jimmie's team, again, for being useless.

6. Basically the same **** as yesterday.

:(

Yeah, it was too early to woo.

Too early to WOOOOO, right?

Being a little bitch is part of working for Gibbs.

He's right.

Ofc. I have the worst fantasy luck I swear.

Uhhhh wtf?