Aliens!

M

Max West

Guest
Two aliens landed in the Arizona desert near an abandoned petrol station. They approached one of the petrol pumps, and one of the aliens addressed it.

"Greetings, Earthling. We come in peace" said the younger of the two. "Take us to your leader."

The petrol pump (of course) didn't respond. The younger alien looked cross and the older one spotted this.

"I wouldn't push it, if I were you" suggested the older one.

The younger creature ignored the warning and repeated the greeting. Again there was no response. Annoyed by what he perceived to be the pump's haughty attitude, he drew his ray gun, and said impatiently,

"Greetings Earthling. We come in peace. Do not ignore us in this way! Take us to your leader, or I will fire!"

The older alien again warned his comrade,
"You don't want to do that. You really don't want to make him mad!"
"Rubbish" replied the younger alien at his rapidly retreating comrade.

He carefully aimed his weapon at the pump and fired. There was a huge explosion. A massive fireball roared outwards and towards them and blew the younger alien off his feet and deposited him in a burnt and crumpled mess 200 meters into the desert. Thirty-five Earth minutes later, when he finally regained consciousness, re-focused his three eyes and straightened his bent antenna array, he looked dazedly up at the wiser one, who was standing over him, slowly shaking his big green head.

"What a ferocious creature", said the young, fried one. "It damn near killed us! How did you know it was so dangerous?" The older alien leaned over, placed a friendly feeler onto the crispy, peeling flesh and shared some knowledge.

"If there's one thing I've learned during my travels through the galaxy", said the healthier one. "When a guy has a ***** he can wrap around himself twice and then stick it in his own ear, you don't mess with him."
 
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