an accident report

Magnethead

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An Accident Report

I am writing in response to your request for "additional information. " Inblock number 30 of the accident report form, I put "poor planning" as thecause for my accident. You said in your last letter that I should explainmore fully. I trust that the following detail will be sufficient.

I am an amateur radio operator. On the day of the accident, I was workingalone on the top section of my new 80-foot antenna tower. When I completedmy work, I discovered that I had, over the course of several trips up thetower, brought about 300 lbs. of tools and spare hardware. Rather than carrythe now unneeded tools and materials down by hand, I decided to lower theitems in a small barrel by using a pulley, which fortunately was attached tothe pole at the tip of the tower. Securing the rope at ground level, I wentup to the top of the tower and loaded the tools and materials into thebarrel. Then I went back to the ground and untied the rope, holding ittightly to insure a slow descent of the 300 lbs. of tools.You will note in block number 11 of the accident report form that I weigh155 lbs. Due to my surprise at being jerked off the ground so suddenly, Ilost my presence of mind and forgot to let go of the rope. Needless to say,I proceeded at a rapid rate up the side of the tower. In the vicinity of the40-foot level, I met the barrel coming down. This explains my fracturedskull and broken clavicle.Slowed only slightly, I continued my rapid ascent, not stopping until thefingers of my right hand were two knuckles deep into the pulley. Fortunatelyby this time I had regained my presence of mind and was able to hold tightlyon the rope in spite of the pain. At about the same time however, the barrelhit the ground. The bottom fell out of the barrel. Devoid of the weight ofthe tools, the barrel now weighed 20 pounds.I refer you again to my weight in block number 11. As you might guess, Ibegan a rapid descent down the side of the tower. In the vicinity of the40-foot level, I met the barrel coming up. This accounts for the twofractured ankles and the lacerations on my legs and lower body.The encounter with the barrel slowed me enough to lessen my injuries when Ifell into the pile of tools, and fortunately only three vertebras werecracked. I am sorry to report, however, that as I lay there on the tools inpain, unable to stand, and watching the empty barrel 80 feet above me, Iagain lost my presence of mind.I let go of the rope.
 
An Accident Report

I am writing in response to your request for "additional information. " Inblock number 30 of the accident report form, I put "poor planning" as thecause for my accident. You said in your last letter that I should explainmore fully. I trust that the following detail will be sufficient.

I am an amateur radio operator. On the day of the accident, I was workingalone on the top section of my new 80-foot antenna tower. When I completedmy work, I discovered that I had, over the course of several trips up thetower, brought about 300 lbs. of tools and spare hardware. Rather than carrythe now unneeded tools and materials down by hand, I decided to lower theitems in a small barrel by using a pulley, which fortunately was attached tothe pole at the tip of the tower. Securing the rope at ground level, I wentup to the top of the tower and loaded the tools and materials into thebarrel. Then I went back to the ground and untied the rope, holding ittightly to insure a slow descent of the 300 lbs. of tools.You will note in block number 11 of the accident report form that I weigh155 lbs. Due to my surprise at being jerked off the ground so suddenly, Ilost my presence of mind and forgot to let go of the rope. Needless to say,I proceeded at a rapid rate up the side of the tower. In the vicinity of the40-foot level, I met the barrel coming down. This explains my fracturedskull and broken clavicle.Slowed only slightly, I continued my rapid ascent, not stopping until thefingers of my right hand were two knuckles deep into the pulley. Fortunatelyby this time I had regained my presence of mind and was able to hold tightlyon the rope in spite of the pain. At about the same time however, the barrelhit the ground. The bottom fell out of the barrel. Devoid of the weight ofthe tools, the barrel now weighed 20 pounds.I refer you again to my weight in block number 11. As you might guess, Ibegan a rapid descent down the side of the tower. In the vicinity of the40-foot level, I met the barrel coming up. This accounts for the twofractured ankles and the lacerations on my legs and lower body.The encounter with the barrel slowed me enough to lessen my injuries when Ifell into the pile of tools, and fortunately only three vertebras werecracked. I am sorry to report, however, that as I lay there on the tools inpain, unable to stand, and watching the empty barrel 80 feet above me, Iagain lost my presence of mind.I let go of the rope.

LMFAO!
 
That hurts, it is like reading a Wiley Coyote moment.
 
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