Dega' Lights?

P

pettyfan4life

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I was at work and someone came in saying that Talladega was getting lights is there any truth to that
 
A Talladega Night race. That sounds like someones asking for trouble.
 
Dega is crazy enough as it is. Imagine running under a full moon there;)
 
I have not heard a thing about lights at 'Dega. It might make for good TV racing, but as a spectator, it wouldn't do much.

The place is just too big for good viewing from the stands.
 
Like I said it someone told me that he also told me that kyle and jeff gordon got killed a while back he does it to piss me off I think but it nevers works I just dont give him good deals when he buys stuff no more
 
Lights are fuuun...

I like night races more doesn't interfere with football in the fall.
 
To make Talladega safer, Nascar has announced that spikes will be added to the front of each car.

Nascar's reasoning is that the spikes will affect the aerodynamics of the cars and slow them down.

Robby Gordon was quoted as saying, "I think it's a great idea. The spikes really fit with my style of driving. I hope they use them."

Mike Helton was unavailable for comment b/c he was trying to count all the money Spike Inc. had bribed him with.
 
The engineers at the University of Nebraska who developed the 'SAFER' wall system were seen developing a wall with saw blades, much like the system found on the TV show Battlebots.

One of the engineers was quoted as saying, "We are all avid fans of Battlebots and are sorry to hear that this is their last season. To keep the spirit alive, we are installing these blades in the walls that will come out and cut the tires of a car when they get to close to the wall. This is very close to Battlebots. In the show, the blades come out from the ground when a battlebot drives over the area. We are hoping for the same result here."
 
Robby Gordon was again quoted, saying "I think the saw blades in the walls are a great idea. I am excited that Nascar is really starting to see racing from my perspective. I'm really excited about next year."

SawBlades Incorporated was also happy about Nascar's decision, "We dumped a lot of cash on Helton's desk. I swear, you think with the deal he did with Fox and NBC, he'd have seen a dump truck of cash before. Hey, wait, you aren't writing this down, are you?"

Helton was unavailable for comment b/c nobody could find him underneath the pile of cash. He is assumed to be in there somewhere, and if he doesn't come out on his own in the next few days, a rescue team will be sent in for him.
 
Wouldn't the food bank be sent for first before the rescue team?

Or are these two teams interchangeable?
 
Helton doesn't need no foodbank with that gut. It would just give him reason to hold out longer in his pile of money.
 
Originally posted by rpmallen
Robby Gordon was again quoted, saying "I think the saw blades in the walls are a great idea. I am excited that Nascar is really starting to see racing from my perspective. I'm really excited about next year."
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:lol2: Too funny, rpmallen and Ciggie.

A Dega night race sounds like trouble though. Who thought of that idea?
 
Mis-fit,

I don't know what to say, I guess college has warped my mind enough to be able to just come up with random stuff like this.
 
Night races generate more money. More money means happier Helton.

Robby Gordon probably had a hand it too. Black car, black night. Would be hard to tell when he hits somone on the back stretch. Hehe.
 
This isn't random stuff, this is all true, didn't you know that?
 
Originally posted by rpmallen
Night races generate more money. More money means happier Helton.

Robby Gordon probably had a hand it too. Black car, black night. Would be hard to tell when he hits somone on the back stretch. Hehe.
Click to expand...

I believe Robbie was planning on running the reverse car as in all orange with the black X for all the night races next year. Can anyone confirm/deny?
 
Yeah, I think so. He must be cursing his sponsor for that now. hehe.

*This message sponsored by Sawblades Inc.*

Hey, why should Helton get all the money?
 
The big Robby Gordon conspiracy. lol. Black to blend in with the night and no one will know when he hits a car on the backstretch. Hmmm, sounds like it could be a fact. Who knows what goes on in his devious mind? (Okay, now I am assuming Robby has a mind)

College has warped my mind too, just in a totally different crazy way. Okay, big truth I was crazy to begin with.
 
Nascar has also recently announced that they will allow the use of flame throwers on the car. No real explanation was given, supposively someone just thought it would be interesting and decided to go with it.

Unrelated, Nascar has announced that while Helton is submerged in his pile of money, the manager of the BAM dodge will me managing Nascar operations. When asked about the the flame throwers, the manager responded, "FlameThowers Inc. came with us with money, and since we hired Derrike Cope b/c he had a sponsor for our own team even though it meant we were flame-torching Shawna's career, it seemed like the best move to make."
 
Warden Samuel Norton the warden of Shawshank Prison is believed to have communicated with the BAM manager via Miss Cleo.

Mr. Norton would like to use his convicts to help make the race for exciting. He has suggested the idea of all inmates convicted for life without parole to be used during the races. These gentlemen and ladies, will be used to pick up debris on the race track. Instead of throwing a yellow flag, the convict will be required to run out and pick up the debris while race conditions remain green and then attempt to make it safely back to the infield.
 
Ciggie says this during each race. "Why are they throwing out a caution for sheet metal, can't they just have a death-row inmate run out and get it off the track?"

This new rule would finally shut him up. lol.
 
lol. Too funny. Now I am going to wonder about that during a race. Why not send a death row prisoner out there? Time them and if they do it under ten seconds without causing an incident, they get an hour outside.

Incentives would make it interesting. The new rule would draw in a different crowd. And I guess Ciggie would be happy.
 
lol, mis-fit, your becoming just as bad as us. Me and RPM just found a third to destroy threads. I never thought of the incentives, I like that idea a lot though.
 
How could you not have thought of incentives? Give them some reason to make it interesting. Otherwise they might just wander out there and try to do something stupid. Incentives work. Good things for good little death row inmates who go fetch the debris.

I like taking over threads. Nice to have people to be slightly evil with.
 
We don't try to take over threads. If other people would post, this would be much more fun.



Robby Gordon was quoted again, this time saying, "I think having convicts on the track would be a great idea. It would be good seeing my mother again!"



I think I'm definitely going to hell now. lol.
 
This just in, in a special announcement given only to reporters who could recite the Nascar rules in the rulebook backwards and then forwards while hopping on one foot.

The new rule is that top speed is out! The cars starting positions will depend on how pretty the car is. If it's ugly they will vote on who gets provisionals, the ugliest car goes home. And in a totally unrelated note, Kenny Wallace has changed his 2003 Stacker2 Car to a more pleasing color of beige and eggshell.

LMAO at the Robby Gordon quote. Man, that was something. Why don't more people join? This is too much fun.
 
I'm sure when people read this in the morning they will be like what the hell happened? Are these people on crack?

But anyway,

John Coffey would be there to test all convicts just to make sure they are guilty before NASCAR would use them. Just to make sure we don't kill any innocent people.
 
Biege and Eggshell might not look so bad on that car. Dale Jarrett's already half-way there.
 
Originally posted by mis-fit
And in a totally unrelated note, Kenny Wallace has changed his 2003 Stacker2 Car to a more pleasing color of beige and eggshell.
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What are you talking about? Flourescent is my favorite color scheme.
 
what, it was flourescent? I was immediately blinded when I looked at Kenny's car, I wasn't able to catch the color.
 
Yeah, flourescent is a nice color if you want to go blind from staring at it too long.

Okay so Kenny doesn't have to change his colors, he will just have to go home. Because all the women in accordance to the rule change will send that car home.

We can throw that rule out and enforce this one, I want this rule. It would make things a lot more fun.

After each caution, the car will run the opposite way ... caution - clockwise - caution - counter clockwise - caution - clockwise ... etc.
 
We talked about this before, Kenny's paint scheme is all about strategy. He just better hope no drivers are colorblind.
 
This just in, Martha Stewart apparently smelled the pile of money that Helton was swimming in and now wants to partner up with Helton.

When ask if she considered how much Nascar stock would go down if Robby Gordon won a championship, but Martha says she's not concerned. She says she looked ahead on the champion list and Nascar doesn't plan to have him win. But if they change their mind, Martha says she will just sell her stock when that season starts.
 
So during the race there will be a bake off as well and we can hear women start your ovens?
 
When asked if Martha Stewart was related to Tony Stewart in anyway, she responded, "No, but if you put that mic any closer to my face and I will punch you in the face"
 
A bake off? Oh no, I thought we already discussed how Helton DOES NOT need any more food.

Though, we could have eating contests for the drivers. Though I'm afraid Spencer might have the advantage on that one.
 
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