Funny One Liners

T

TurboDiesel

Guest
If they put your brain on a razor blade it'd look like a ball-bearing rollin' down a four lane highway.
does anyone else have any others i am looking for a good signature
TNWARDFAN if i am posting too much I Am Sorry...im just a newbie and trying to get to know people
Anyway what are some good things for my signature.
 
Yer fine dude...jump right in.

How about this one....Last time I heard a laugh like that, it was riding off on a broom.
 
TD you're more than welcome here dude...post away. There are no more "clicks" here. ;)
 
Post too much?

here's a onliner (I guess you could call it that) that I heard one time that cracked me up

"those pants like a green house for a$$ pimples"
 
Originally posted by paul@Feb 11 2003, 12:24 PM
TD you're more than welcome here dude...post away. There are no more "clicks" here. ;)
Click to expand...
What's a "click"?
 
TD was here a while ago, and felt some people weren't very friendly to him because he didn't have thousands of posts.

Anyway, how about..."When I was growing up, we had a quicksand box. I was an only child... eventually" ~Steven Wright.
 
"That girl's so buck-toothed, she could eat a pumpkin through a barn crack."
 
Here is a idea, take any quote and add "in my pants" behind it. Thats always funny.

EX.) "I am not a crook in my pants"
"My the force be with you in your pants"
"Harry Potter has come back to my pants"
"I will get you and your little dog to in my pants"

Or replce words with spank (my fav.)

"I would rather spank a wookie"
"How may we spank you?"
"I am tarzan u spanky"

Have fun with it :p
 
haahaa thanks spok
i think i will use one of those in my pants
 
Watch full metal jacket, and you'll have many to choose from.

The best part of you ran down the crack of your momma's a$$ and ended up as a brown stain on the mattress.

Although I suppose that would be a bit mean for a signature. Not to mention some pc person would piss and moan.

There's plenty of good oneliners from the Blues Brothers as well.
 
Some days you are the pigeon. Some days you are the statue.

When money talks, no one criticizes its accent.

I don't have an attitude problem. You have a perception problem.

My reality check bounced.

If At First You Don't Succeed...Blame Someone Else And Seek Counseling.

Only in America, could a letter offering a million dollar prize be considered junk mail.

Never be afraid to try something new. Remember, amateurs built the Ark. Professionals, on the other hand, built the Titanic.

Never argue with an idiot. They drag you down to their level then beat you with experience.

If at first you don't succeed, skydiving is not for you.

What if the Hokey Pokey is really what it’s all about?

Think nobody knows you're alive? Try missing a payment.

Eat one live toad the first thing in the morning. Nothing worse will happen to you for the rest of the day

Friends may come and go, but enemies accumulate

The screw up fairy has visited us again

I got a million of them. Just ask if you need more.

Try Good Quotesfor a lot of good ones or Crazy Thoughts
 
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