Mothers' Maintenance Manual
Many of us take better care of our cars then we do our mothers and yet
we only expect our cars to last 5 or 6 years but we expect our mothers to
last for a lifetime. Maybe we need a maintenance manual for mothers so we
would know how to take care of them at least as well as we do our automobiles.
Here are some items that might be included in such a manual.
Engine:
A mother's engine is one of the most dependable kinds you can find.
She can reach top speed from a prone position at a single cry from a sleeping
child. But regular breaks are needed to keep up that peak performance.
Mothers need a hot bath and a nap every 100 miles, a baby-sitter and a
night out every 1,000 miles, and a live in baby-sitter with a one week
vacation every 10,000
miles.
Battery:
Mother's batteries should be recharged regularly. Handmade items,notes,
unexpected hugs and kisses, and frequent "I Love you's" will do very
well
for a recharge.
Carburetor:
When a mother's carburetor floods it should be treated immediately
with Kleenex and a soft shoulder.
Brakes:
See that she uses her brakes to slow down often and come to a full
stop occasionally. (A squeaking sound indicates a need for a rest).
Fuel:
Most mothers can run indefinitely on coffee, leftovers and salads, but an
occasional dinner for two at a nice restaurant will really add to her efficiency.
Chassis:
Mothers run best when their bodies are properly maintained. Regular
exercise should be encouraged and provided for as necessary. A change
in hairdo or makeup in spring and fall are also helpful. If you notice
the chassis
begins to sag, immediately start a program of walking,
jogging, swimming, or bike riding. These are most effective when done with
fathers.
Tune-ups:
Mothers need regular tune-ups. Compliments are both the cheapest and
most effective way to keep a mother purring contentedly. If these
instructions are followed consistently, this fantastic creation and gift from God,
that we call MOTHER should last a lifetime and give good service and
constant love to those who need her most.
For ALL the Moms, and I honor my late mom with this post.
Many of us take better care of our cars then we do our mothers and yet
we only expect our cars to last 5 or 6 years but we expect our mothers to
last for a lifetime. Maybe we need a maintenance manual for mothers so we
would know how to take care of them at least as well as we do our automobiles.
Here are some items that might be included in such a manual.
Engine:
A mother's engine is one of the most dependable kinds you can find.
She can reach top speed from a prone position at a single cry from a sleeping
child. But regular breaks are needed to keep up that peak performance.
Mothers need a hot bath and a nap every 100 miles, a baby-sitter and a
night out every 1,000 miles, and a live in baby-sitter with a one week
vacation every 10,000
miles.
Battery:
Mother's batteries should be recharged regularly. Handmade items,notes,
unexpected hugs and kisses, and frequent "I Love you's" will do very
well
for a recharge.
Carburetor:
When a mother's carburetor floods it should be treated immediately
with Kleenex and a soft shoulder.
Brakes:
See that she uses her brakes to slow down often and come to a full
stop occasionally. (A squeaking sound indicates a need for a rest).
Fuel:
Most mothers can run indefinitely on coffee, leftovers and salads, but an
occasional dinner for two at a nice restaurant will really add to her efficiency.
Chassis:
Mothers run best when their bodies are properly maintained. Regular
exercise should be encouraged and provided for as necessary. A change
in hairdo or makeup in spring and fall are also helpful. If you notice
the chassis
begins to sag, immediately start a program of walking,
jogging, swimming, or bike riding. These are most effective when done with
fathers.
Tune-ups:
Mothers need regular tune-ups. Compliments are both the cheapest and
most effective way to keep a mother purring contentedly. If these
instructions are followed consistently, this fantastic creation and gift from God,
that we call MOTHER should last a lifetime and give good service and
constant love to those who need her most.
For ALL the Moms, and I honor my late mom with this post.