I'm down

HoneyBadger

HoneyBadger

I love short track racing (Taylor's Version)
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This has not been the worst Christmas ever, I did end up getting to see everyone as a result of not getting any sleep and going to work super-early this morning.

As many of you know, this is the time of the year when I get really down.

Anyways, the recent deal at work is that everyone thinks I need a girlfriend. For the first time ever, I agree with this sentiment. Not having a relationship with someone I enjoy being around has taken a lot out of me. I've had flings here and there, but nothing has ever transpired. I've always felt that I don't need a relationship with someone and that I can be fine independently.

Over the past few months, my attitude has changed. Now, most of my friends who I hung out with, well, they're all in serious relationships now and we're just not out drinking anymore.

So I find myself spending my nights sitting at home on facebook drinking myself probably to an early death with massive consumption of alcohol and energy drinks on a daily basis. I've generally always been pessimistic but I've also always had some breaks go my way her and there. For two year now, that's not been the case. Things have gone downhill quicker than Lindsey Vonn at the Winter Olympics.

I am angry and depressed in ways I've never been before. Yes, I have people I hang out with who make me happy, but I don't want to have to be drunk to be happy. I'm tired of it. I just want one damn thing to go right.

My grandparents -- they want the best out of me, they really do. They just don't get how difficult they've made things for me demanding I go to school twice as much as I did last semester and work twice as much as I did last semester. It's just not going to work unless I completely kill myself from the amount of Red Bull I will consume on a daily basis.

My job -- yeah, I went out of my way to do them a favor in exchange for a favor from them. In return, I end up being the only person to ever have a night shift Christmas Eve and a morning shift Christmas Day. Honestly, I don't believe stores should be open Christmas Day, but that's what big business is about, making profit. I'm thankful to have a job, but that doesn't make being screwed feel any better.

All I want for 2011 is some improvement... I'm not asking for everything to go right, I just wish everything didn't go wrong.
 
AndyMarquisLive said:
This has not been the worst Christmas ever, I did end up getting to see everyone as a result of not getting any sleep and going to work super-early this morning.

As many of you know, this is the time of the year when I get really down.

Anyways, the recent deal at work is that everyone thinks I need a girlfriend. For the first time ever, I agree with this sentiment. Not having a relationship with someone I enjoy being around has taken a lot out of me. I've had flings here and there, but nothing has ever transpired. I've always felt that I don't need a relationship with someone and that I can be fine independently.

Over the past few months, my attitude has changed. Now, most of my friends who I hung out with, well, they're all in serious relationships now and we're just not out drinking anymore.

So I find myself spending my nights sitting at home on facebook drinking myself probably to an early death with massive consumption of alcohol and energy drinks on a daily basis. I've generally always been pessimistic but I've also always had some breaks go my way her and there. For two year now, that's not been the case. Things have gone downhill quicker than Lindsey Vonn at the Winter Olympics.

I am angry and depressed in ways I've never been before. Yes, I have people I hang out with who make me happy, but I don't want to have to be drunk to be happy. I'm tired of it. I just want one damn thing to go right.

My grandparents -- they want the best out of me, they really do. They just don't get how difficult they've made things for me demanding I go to school twice as much as I did last semester and work twice as much as I did last semester. It's just not going to work unless I completely kill myself from the amount of Red Bull I will consume on a daily basis.

My job -- yeah, I went out of my way to do them a favor in exchange for a favor from them. In return, I end up being the only person to ever have a night shift Christmas Eve and a morning shift Christmas Day. Honestly, I don't believe stores should be open Christmas Day, but that's what big business is about, making profit. I'm thankful to have a job, but that doesn't make being screwed feel any better.

All I want for 2011 is some improvement... I'm not asking for everything to go right, I just wish everything didn't go wrong.
Click to expand...

What kind of car do you drive?
 
Hey Andy!

I may tease and torment you here sometimes and maybe my words haven't been the kindest either. But I do recognize the signs of someone that is truly hurting and confused about life. I also recognize that there are signs of maturity in what you are saying too.

Having someone in your life that understands and loves you is a blessing. We don't always find that person but the fact that you recognize the need for someone like that is a good thing. So many people value their independence to the point that they become hurtful to others and care only about themselves.

You are an intelligent person that seeks happiness, security and the feeling of being a productive human being. You can be that with some changes to your lifestyle.

You won't find your answers in alcohol and the I think that energy drinks are one of the worst things to happen to mankind. It just pushes you beyond what you were made to do in the normal sense of living.

Andy, I appreciate your desire to get ahead with an education and the fact that you DO want to work and not be a burden to others. I can only suggest that you cut back a little on the work and maybe even the school time. You can still get your degree with time. Time is not your enemy. Your youth is your advantage. You can still work hard and learn to enjoy your life too. Sometimes you might need to give up on purchasing the latest phone, game, software or whatever for the sake of having the cash to have a roof over you head and some food in your belly. But there will come a time that you will be successful and be able to own the toys that you desire.

Female companionship is wonderful. Just don't saddle your life with a wife/girlfriend and a kid early on. Learn from your interaction with others of both sexes. Friends will come and go. True love will last forever.

Andy, I am sincere when I say that I am sorry that you are so down at this special time of year. It is not uncommon for that to happen. I have experienced it in my lifetime many times. But realizing this is a temporary thing and picking yourself up and continuing to realize that you have a long, productive and fun life ahead is what you have to keep telling yourself.

I am sure it was not easy for you to post this note and I think it was a good thing that you did. I hope that others here will give you some words of encouragement more than I could do.

If I get to the Richmond or Dover races for work this year and you are in the area, I'd be happy to buy you a beer and chat for a bit. We all get on one another's nerves here but I think we all care about each other as friends.

Don't give up Andy! Understand your limitations and work on your strengths and weakness. Things will get better but you are the only one that can make that happen.
 
Guido that was a really great post.

Andy, I agree with him 100%. Time is on your side, so dont rush it.
And booze aint the answer....I know that from experience.


Chin up buddy

PS...I worked the 25 and 26 Dec ...and the next 4 afternoon shifts; so you arent alone there. Our planes fly everyday
 
Guido said:
Hey Andy!

I may tease and torment you here sometimes and maybe my words haven't been the kindest either. But I do recognize the signs of someone that is truly hurting and confused about life. I also recognize that there are signs of maturity in what you are saying too.

Having someone in your life that understands and loves you is a blessing. We don't always find that person but the fact that you recognize the need for someone like that is a good thing. So many people value their independence to the point that they become hurtful to others and care only about themselves.

You are an intelligent person that seeks happiness, security and the feeling of being a productive human being. You can be that with some changes to your lifestyle.

You won't find your answers in alcohol and the I think that energy drinks are one of the worst things to happen to mankind. It just pushes you beyond what you were made to do in the normal sense of living.

Andy, I appreciate your desire to get ahead with an education and the fact that you DO want to work and not be a burden to others. I can only suggest that you cut back a little on the work and maybe even the school time. You can still get your degree with time. Time is not your enemy. Your youth is your advantage. You can still work hard and learn to enjoy your life too. Sometimes you might need to give up on purchasing the latest phone, game, software or whatever for the sake of having the cash to have a roof over you head and some food in your belly. But there will come a time that you will be successful and be able to own the toys that you desire.

Female companionship is wonderful. Just don't saddle your life with a wife/girlfriend and a kid early on. Learn from your interaction with others of both sexes. Friends will come and go. True love will last forever.

Andy, I am sincere when I say that I am sorry that you are so down at this special time of year. It is not uncommon for that to happen. I have experienced it in my lifetime many times. But realizing this is a temporary thing and picking yourself up and continuing to realize that you have a long, productive and fun life ahead is what you have to keep telling yourself.

I am sure it was not easy for you to post this note and I think it was a good thing that you did. I hope that others here will give you some words of encouragement more than I could do.

If I get to the Richmond or Dover races for work this year and you are in the area, I'd be happy to buy you a beer and chat for a bit. We all get on one another's nerves here but I think we all care about each other as friends.

Don't give up Andy! Understand your limitations and work on your strengths and weakness. Things will get better but you are the only one that can make that happen.
Click to expand...

Andy- We need to talk.

Guido- I agree. I'm cutting back to 3/4 time so that we can race and I can work and not be under any pressure. The way the economy and job market is right now (and the connections I've made), there is no rush to get my degree. Even my advisor at college said, no sense in getting a degree now. There are some graduates that still dont have jobs. The guy i replaced at work had 2 masters degrees and 2 bachelors, and hasn't had a company call him back yet. I'm lucky because I know somebody going into the engineering field, even better, it's racing related. If I get lucky, I get lucky. If I don't....I'm still 3.5-4 years from graduating. All I can say, is do NOT look at your student loan totals. Doing that alone will send you into pure alchoholism.
 
You have to love yourself before you can love someone enough to be in a healthy relationship. With or without the drinking you will bring them down.
You have to have compassion for others.
Do not choose to be a victim all the time.
You want people to be there for you....well, you have to be there for them, too.
Walk with confidence, not arrogance.
The drinking probably is causing most of the problem with the living arramgments. It would be a problem at my home. If you have money for Alcohol, you should have money for school or living expense.
 
kelloggs5TLfan said:
You have to love yourself before you can love someone enough to be in a healthy relationship. With or without the drinking you will bring them down.
You have to have compassion for others.
Do not choose to be a victim all the time.
You want people to be there for you....well, you have to be there for them, too.
Walk with confidence, not arrogance.
The drinking probably is causing most of the problem with the living arramgments. It would be a problem at my home. If you have money for Alcohol, you should have money for school or living expense.
Click to expand...

+1....

Take a break from school for a semester or so. Get your life in order. God knows there are hardly anyjobs right now. Drinking never hepls..only hurts
 
I have to say that I agree with much of the sentiments expressed by other posters in this thread. It is a much better time to be in school than it is to be on the job market right now.

Andy whatever it takes to get sobered up is worth it. I got back into church and got sobered up over 20 years ago. I feel very fortunate and blessed to have had that happen. I'm not trying to suggest that path for you, nor am I trying to discourage you from that either. I'm just saying that my life was a pretty big mess when I was an alcoholic. It wasn't an overnight fix, but nothing I did to turn things around would have been possible if I was still drinking. I also met my wife at church and that has turned out pretty well too. I can guarantee that my wife wouldn't have given me the time of day if I was still drinking when I met her. You have to look at the type of person you want to date and make sure that you are the type of person they would date.
 
Benevolent One said:
I have to say that I agree with much of the sentiments expressed by other posters in this thread. It is a much better time to be in school than it is to be on the job market right now.

Andy whatever it takes to get sobered up is worth it. I got back into church and got sobered up over 20 years ago. I feel very fortunate and blessed to have had that happen. I'm not trying to suggest that path for you, nor am I trying to discourage you from that either. I'm just saying that my life was a pretty big mess when I was an alcoholic. It wasn't an overnight fix, but nothing I did to turn things around would have been possible if I was still drinking. I also met my wife at church and that has turned out pretty well too. I can guarantee that my wife wouldn't have given me the time of day if I was still drinking when I met her. You have to look at the type of person you want to date and make sure that you are the type of person they would date.
Click to expand...

I was going to add church, but I hit reply by accident before I was finished typing.
 
I can't give you some deep professional advice but sometimes the small things make all the difference. Ya just gotta take a deep breath sometimes man and not let everything get you down. I've seen your posts on here and you just seem to be angry about everything. Whenever you get angry with your grandparents go take a walk or go read a book anything to relax. As far as the drinking goes you should just put that garbage down. Nothing good comes from drinking.
 
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