Whizzer
Gig'em
A little girl: was talking to her teacher about whales.
The teacher: said it was physically impossible for a whale to swallow a
human because even though it was a very large mammal its throat was very
small.
The little girl: stated that Jonah was swallowed by a whale.
Irritated, the teacher: reiterated that a whale could not swallow a human;
it was physically impossible.
The little girl: said, "When I get to heaven I will ask Jonah".
The teacher: asked, " What if Jonah went to hell?"
The little girl: replied, "Then you ask him".
********************************************************************
A Kindergarten teacher: was observing her classroom of children while
they were drawing. She would occasionally walk around to see each
child's work.
As she got to one little girl who was working diligently, she asked
what the drawing was.
The girl: replied, "I'm drawing God."
The teacher: paused and said, "But no one knows what God looks like."
Without missing a beat, or looking up from her drawing, the girl:
replied, "They will in a minute."
********************************************************************
The children had all been photographed, and the teacher was trying to
persuade them each to buy a copy of the group picture.
"Just think how nice it will be to look at it when you are all grown up
and you can say, 'There's Jennifer, she's a lawyer,' or 'That's Michael,
he's a doctor.'
A small voice at the back of the room rang out, "And there's the teacher, she's dead. "
*******************************************************************
A teacher was giving a lesson on the circulation of the blood.
Trying to make the matter clearer, she said, "Now, class, if I stood on my
head, the blood, as you know, would run into it, and I would turn red in the
face.."
"Yes," the class said.
"Then why is it that while I am standing upright in the ordinary position the blood doesn't run into my feet?"
A little fellow shouted, "Cause your feet ain't empty."
********************************************************************
And last but not least.....................................................................................
The children were lined up in the cafeteria of a Catholic elementary
school for lunch.
At the head of the table was a large pile of apples.
The nun made a note, and posted on the apple tray:
"Take only ONE. God is watching."
Moving further along the lunch line, at the other end of the table was a
large pile of chocolate chip cookies.
A child had written a note, "Take all you want. God is watching the apples.
:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:
The teacher: said it was physically impossible for a whale to swallow a
human because even though it was a very large mammal its throat was very
small.
The little girl: stated that Jonah was swallowed by a whale.
Irritated, the teacher: reiterated that a whale could not swallow a human;
it was physically impossible.
The little girl: said, "When I get to heaven I will ask Jonah".
The teacher: asked, " What if Jonah went to hell?"
The little girl: replied, "Then you ask him".
********************************************************************
A Kindergarten teacher: was observing her classroom of children while
they were drawing. She would occasionally walk around to see each
child's work.
As she got to one little girl who was working diligently, she asked
what the drawing was.
The girl: replied, "I'm drawing God."
The teacher: paused and said, "But no one knows what God looks like."
Without missing a beat, or looking up from her drawing, the girl:
replied, "They will in a minute."
********************************************************************
The children had all been photographed, and the teacher was trying to
persuade them each to buy a copy of the group picture.
"Just think how nice it will be to look at it when you are all grown up
and you can say, 'There's Jennifer, she's a lawyer,' or 'That's Michael,
he's a doctor.'
A small voice at the back of the room rang out, "And there's the teacher, she's dead. "
*******************************************************************
A teacher was giving a lesson on the circulation of the blood.
Trying to make the matter clearer, she said, "Now, class, if I stood on my
head, the blood, as you know, would run into it, and I would turn red in the
face.."
"Yes," the class said.
"Then why is it that while I am standing upright in the ordinary position the blood doesn't run into my feet?"
A little fellow shouted, "Cause your feet ain't empty."
********************************************************************
And last but not least.....................................................................................
The children were lined up in the cafeteria of a Catholic elementary
school for lunch.
At the head of the table was a large pile of apples.
The nun made a note, and posted on the apple tray:
"Take only ONE. God is watching."
Moving further along the lunch line, at the other end of the table was a
large pile of chocolate chip cookies.
A child had written a note, "Take all you want. God is watching the apples.
:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:
