POWER OUTAGE DURING A MAMMOGRAM
>?
>I actually kept my mammogram appointment. I was met with, 'Hi! I'm
Belinda!' This perky clipboard carrier smiled from ear to ear, tilted her
head to one side and crooned, 'All I need you to do is step
into this room right here, strip to the waist, then slip on
this gown.
>?
>Everything clear? I'm thinking, 'Belinda, try decaf. This ain't rocket
science.' Belinda skipped away to prepare the chamber of horrors .
>?
>With the right side finished, Belinda flipped me (literally) to the left
and said, 'Hmmmm. Can you stand on your tippy toes and lean in a tad so we
can get everything?'
>?
>Fine, I answered. I was freezing, bruised, and out of air, so why not use
the remaining circulation in my legs and neck and finish me off? My body
was in a holding pattern that defied gravity (with my other boob wedged
between those two 4 inch pieces of square glass) when we heard, then felt a
zap! Complete darkness and the power went off! Oh, maintenance is working.
Bet they hit a snag.' Belinda headed for the door.
>?
>'Excuse me! You're not leaving me in this vise alone are you?' I shouted.
>?
>Belinda kept going and said, 'Oh, you fussy puppy ... The door's wide
open so you'll have the emergency hall lights. I'll be right
back.'
?
Before I could shout 'NOOOO!' she
disappeared.
>?
>And tha t's exactly how Bubba and Earl, maintenance men extraordinaire,
found me, Half-naked and part of me dangling from the Jaws of Life, and the
other part smashed between glass!
>?
>After exchanging polite 'Hi, how's it going' type greetings, Bubba (or
possibly Earl) asked, to my utter disbelief, if I knew the power was
off. Trying to disguise my hysteria, I replied with as much calmness as
possible 'Uh, yes, yes I did thank You bet, take care' Bubba replied and
waved good-bye as though I'd been standing in the line at the grocery store.
>?
>Two hours later, Belinda breezes in wearing a sheepish grin. Making no
attempt to suppress her amusement, she said, 'Oh I am sooo sorry!' The power
came back on and I totally forgot about you! And silly me, I went to
lunch. Are we upset?' And that, Your Honor, is exactly how her head ended
up between the clamps....
>?
>?
>I actually kept my mammogram appointment. I was met with, 'Hi! I'm
Belinda!' This perky clipboard carrier smiled from ear to ear, tilted her
head to one side and crooned, 'All I need you to do is step
into this room right here, strip to the waist, then slip on
this gown.
>?
>Everything clear? I'm thinking, 'Belinda, try decaf. This ain't rocket
science.' Belinda skipped away to prepare the chamber of horrors .
>?
>With the right side finished, Belinda flipped me (literally) to the left
and said, 'Hmmmm. Can you stand on your tippy toes and lean in a tad so we
can get everything?'
>?
>Fine, I answered. I was freezing, bruised, and out of air, so why not use
the remaining circulation in my legs and neck and finish me off? My body
was in a holding pattern that defied gravity (with my other boob wedged
between those two 4 inch pieces of square glass) when we heard, then felt a
zap! Complete darkness and the power went off! Oh, maintenance is working.
Bet they hit a snag.' Belinda headed for the door.
>?
>'Excuse me! You're not leaving me in this vise alone are you?' I shouted.
>?
>Belinda kept going and said, 'Oh, you fussy puppy ... The door's wide
open so you'll have the emergency hall lights. I'll be right
back.'
?
Before I could shout 'NOOOO!' she
disappeared.
>?
>And tha t's exactly how Bubba and Earl, maintenance men extraordinaire,
found me, Half-naked and part of me dangling from the Jaws of Life, and the
other part smashed between glass!
>?
>After exchanging polite 'Hi, how's it going' type greetings, Bubba (or
possibly Earl) asked, to my utter disbelief, if I knew the power was
off. Trying to disguise my hysteria, I replied with as much calmness as
possible 'Uh, yes, yes I did thank You bet, take care' Bubba replied and
waved good-bye as though I'd been standing in the line at the grocery store.
>?
>Two hours later, Belinda breezes in wearing a sheepish grin. Making no
attempt to suppress her amusement, she said, 'Oh I am sooo sorry!' The power
came back on and I totally forgot about you! And silly me, I went to
lunch. Are we upset?' And that, Your Honor, is exactly how her head ended
up between the clamps....
>?
