Week 34 of 36, Dickies 500 at Texas Motor Speedway
Rank Prev Number Driver Comments
1 1 Jimmie Johnson Report: Johnson finishes second, facial expression remains same for 1,000th consecutive day
2 2 Dale Earnhardt Jr. True story: At the race, sheets are always handed out that detail the caution laps, what the caution was for, etc. When we got the second one -- the one after the Lap 83 debris caution that got Junior back on the lead lap -- the sheet had the reason for the caution listed as "TBD."
3 4 Carl Edwards Ol' Eddie Haskell has scored more points than anyone in the last six races.
4 7 Tony Stewart So David Ragan paid $5,750 for a chance to share a two-seater stock car with Tony Stewart. Ragan wanted to meet Stewart and apologize for anything that happened at Martinsville, but Stewart declined, leading me to believe that Stewart was afraid that Ragan would actually be driving the car.
5 8 Bobby Labonte Report: Paul Andrews totally planning to ask for huge raise soon
6 5 Denny Hamlin I can only hear the kids who rang Denny's door to get some candy on Halloween. "Who are you dressed up as? Napoleon Dynamite?"
7 3 Kasey Kahne It is OK, Kasey. Allstate offers accident forgiveness, even if David Stremme [bleeping] doesn't.
8 9 Jeff Gordon He said the glare of the sun was pretty bad on Sunday. I just don't see why he simply can't grow his eyebrows out and use gel to create a sort of temporary sunshield.
9 11 Matt Kenseth He rarely, if ever, gets recognized for an autograph. Just an observation. The man operates in relative anonymity.
10 6 Jeff Burton Wawd isa bahck in da race at Texus and iz-uh plannin' on gettin' Wobby Guhdon back for throwin' dat fuhoooom paddin' and ruinin' Jeff's race.
11 17 Greg Biffle OK, I walked into Subway again. I asked for a Subway club. Worker looks right at me and says, "I know you want a Subway sub. You're in Subway."
12 10 Mark Martin He has three excellent chances to win a race before the year is over. I am not sure how easy it will be for him to win next year in a part-time role.
13 13 Kyle Busch His trick-or-treating streak ended at 16 years on Tuesday night. I may have used that joke last year though. It sure is getting late in the season. Geez.
14 15 Casey Mears People in the NASCAR garages are already calling the crowd constantly around Montoya his "Juantorage."
15 12 Kevin Harvick He was voted by the media "least likely to give a post-race interview after a finish of sixth or worse."
16 20 Dale Jarrett He only needs to lead two more laps to pass Dave Blaney for 31st on the laps-led list for 2006. Also, if he is able to lead two laps on Sunday, he will crack double digits for the year, so he has that going for him, which is nice.
17 14 Brian Vickers Report: Vickers relieved that Johnson will win championship despite Talladega tiff
18 16 Kurt Busch I wonder why he hasn't made an appearance on the successful and very funny Miller Lite "Man Law" ads. He could get on there and compare plastic surgery stories with Burt Reynolds.
19 19 Clint Bowyer Clint looks so mean that he doesn't need roll-bar padding to bring out the caution. He simply glares at the flagman when he drives by.
20 NR Robby Gordon Report: Gordon denies throwing roll-bar padding, claims it was David Ragan who did it
21 NR Martin Truex Jr. Did you see the Bass Pro Shops trophy? It weighed more than 800 pounds. It will (barely) be the heaviest thing in Tony Stewart's house.
22 NR Joe Nemechek Report: Nemechek finishes in top 10 again, hopes Martin feels a tad guilty about taking his ride
23 24 Reed Sorenson He was busted for throwing roll-bar padding back in the spring. He didn't get in much trouble. See, if I was Robby, I would have looked directly in the camera and said, "But the team owner ordered me to," and then searched Dave Burns' face to see how slowly he got the joke.
24 NR Jeff Green I saw on CNN.COM on Tuesday that Bob Barker had retired, and I was afraid for just a second that it was Jeff Green's former crew chief.
25 23 Elliott Sadler Report: Kids riot outside Sadler's home after learning he didn't have any M&M's
The Power Rankings are written by Ryan Smithson and the opinions listed here are solely those of the writer. To email Ryan about the Rankings, click here.
Rank Prev Number Driver Comments
1 1 Jimmie Johnson Report: Johnson finishes second, facial expression remains same for 1,000th consecutive day
2 2 Dale Earnhardt Jr. True story: At the race, sheets are always handed out that detail the caution laps, what the caution was for, etc. When we got the second one -- the one after the Lap 83 debris caution that got Junior back on the lead lap -- the sheet had the reason for the caution listed as "TBD."
3 4 Carl Edwards Ol' Eddie Haskell has scored more points than anyone in the last six races.
4 7 Tony Stewart So David Ragan paid $5,750 for a chance to share a two-seater stock car with Tony Stewart. Ragan wanted to meet Stewart and apologize for anything that happened at Martinsville, but Stewart declined, leading me to believe that Stewart was afraid that Ragan would actually be driving the car.
5 8 Bobby Labonte Report: Paul Andrews totally planning to ask for huge raise soon
6 5 Denny Hamlin I can only hear the kids who rang Denny's door to get some candy on Halloween. "Who are you dressed up as? Napoleon Dynamite?"
7 3 Kasey Kahne It is OK, Kasey. Allstate offers accident forgiveness, even if David Stremme [bleeping] doesn't.
8 9 Jeff Gordon He said the glare of the sun was pretty bad on Sunday. I just don't see why he simply can't grow his eyebrows out and use gel to create a sort of temporary sunshield.
9 11 Matt Kenseth He rarely, if ever, gets recognized for an autograph. Just an observation. The man operates in relative anonymity.
10 6 Jeff Burton Wawd isa bahck in da race at Texus and iz-uh plannin' on gettin' Wobby Guhdon back for throwin' dat fuhoooom paddin' and ruinin' Jeff's race.
11 17 Greg Biffle OK, I walked into Subway again. I asked for a Subway club. Worker looks right at me and says, "I know you want a Subway sub. You're in Subway."
12 10 Mark Martin He has three excellent chances to win a race before the year is over. I am not sure how easy it will be for him to win next year in a part-time role.
13 13 Kyle Busch His trick-or-treating streak ended at 16 years on Tuesday night. I may have used that joke last year though. It sure is getting late in the season. Geez.
14 15 Casey Mears People in the NASCAR garages are already calling the crowd constantly around Montoya his "Juantorage."
15 12 Kevin Harvick He was voted by the media "least likely to give a post-race interview after a finish of sixth or worse."
16 20 Dale Jarrett He only needs to lead two more laps to pass Dave Blaney for 31st on the laps-led list for 2006. Also, if he is able to lead two laps on Sunday, he will crack double digits for the year, so he has that going for him, which is nice.
17 14 Brian Vickers Report: Vickers relieved that Johnson will win championship despite Talladega tiff
18 16 Kurt Busch I wonder why he hasn't made an appearance on the successful and very funny Miller Lite "Man Law" ads. He could get on there and compare plastic surgery stories with Burt Reynolds.
19 19 Clint Bowyer Clint looks so mean that he doesn't need roll-bar padding to bring out the caution. He simply glares at the flagman when he drives by.
20 NR Robby Gordon Report: Gordon denies throwing roll-bar padding, claims it was David Ragan who did it
21 NR Martin Truex Jr. Did you see the Bass Pro Shops trophy? It weighed more than 800 pounds. It will (barely) be the heaviest thing in Tony Stewart's house.
22 NR Joe Nemechek Report: Nemechek finishes in top 10 again, hopes Martin feels a tad guilty about taking his ride
23 24 Reed Sorenson He was busted for throwing roll-bar padding back in the spring. He didn't get in much trouble. See, if I was Robby, I would have looked directly in the camera and said, "But the team owner ordered me to," and then searched Dave Burns' face to see how slowly he got the joke.
24 NR Jeff Green I saw on CNN.COM on Tuesday that Bob Barker had retired, and I was afraid for just a second that it was Jeff Green's former crew chief.
25 23 Elliott Sadler Report: Kids riot outside Sadler's home after learning he didn't have any M&M's
The Power Rankings are written by Ryan Smithson and the opinions listed here are solely those of the writer. To email Ryan about the Rankings, click here.