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hurrikahne9
Guest
1 6 Jimmie Johnson We love it when he wins because it’s funny to see all the local network affiliates claim that a “Jimmy” Johnson won the race.
2 2 Jamie McMurray Under the old points system, he’d be sixth. If he had made the Chase, he’d be second. If he had been the one responsible for the x-measurement penalty, he’d be fired.
3 3 Jeff Gordon He's never won at Phoenix. Which means he will win there this weekend.
4 7 Mark Martin Dude, that sucked. We’d rather wait for a flu shot than sit and listen to Mark Martin be dejected after he leads 891 laps and has to settle for second. Talk about pain.
5 1 Kurt Busch Not sure what disappointed him more -- the blown engine, or the fact that Jimmy Spencer showed up on Inside Nextel Cup on Monday night.
6 5 Ryan Newman He’s the reason they don’t award points for qualifying.
7 4 Dale Earnhardt Jr. Peace out, championship.
8 10 Tony Stewart He ran a McDonald’s car in the Busch race, which means Tony knows how to eBay. Where else would he have gotten a hold of one of Andy Houston’s old firesuits?
9 13 Joe Nemechek The way he is running, kids are going to actually want to use his car the next time they play Chase for the Nextel Cup on Playstation.
10 14 Jeff Burton He probably called Dale Jr. right after the race to remind him that he didn’t drive the No. 99 Ford any more.
11 8 Rusty Wallace So he got fined $10,000 for running into Ryan Newman’s car at Martinsville. Although it really won’t be a fine, because Rusty can just get Ryan a toaster for Christmas instead of a new motorcycle, so it all evens out.
12 9 Jeremy Mayfield He needs to finish 17th this week to break the vicious cycle of a top-five followed by a bad run.
13 15 Ricky Rudd He’s scored six straight top-16 finishes, which means we’re really mad he didn’t finish 15th at Charlotte, because it sounds a lot freakin’ better when you can claim you have six straight finishes of 15th or better.
14 12 Dale Jarrett He can still catch Jamie McMurray for 11th as long as McMurray skips the last three races to focus on the Truck Series.
15 11 Elliott Sadler He’s ran into Joe Nemechek two weeks in a row. Maybe it’s Nemechek’s way of telling Sadler he didn’t appreciate him rooting for Ricky Rudd to beat Nemechek at Kansas.
16 19 Kasey Kahne Time to borrow your teammate's Flowbee.
17 21 Greg Biffle Subway’s offering a campaign where you can sign up to meet Greg Biffle. Mark Martin has entered the contest in hopes he can ask Greg about what happened on that last restart.
18 16 Matt Kenseth He said that he is going to buy a dishwasher with the $1 million he won for winning the IROC title. If he needed the money that badly, then he should have just swallowed his pride and asked Jimmie Johnson for a freebie from Lowe’s.
19 NR Carl Edwards That might have been the highest-ever finish by a driver named Carl. Actually, Carl (Edwards) set the record back in his Nextel Cup debut, when his 10th-place finish easily bested Carl Long’s 29th-place finish at Charlotte back in 2000.
20 18 Kevin Harvick Whoa. Three engine failures in four weeks. Apparently, that was a simple clerical error, because Robby was supposed to get those motors.
21 20 Michael Waltrip Mikey, you actually just might want to let ol’ DW drive the Aaron’s Dream Machine in the next Busch race, because you haven’t had a top-10 in it in the last 16 tries. Do the math.
22 NR Brian Vickers He had his career best finish on Sunday, but no one noticed.
23 22 Brendan Gaughan So now he’s rumored to be in the hunt for the No. 0 Netzero Chevrolet. We’ve already done studies on this and we’ve determined that Brendan can say “Netzero” up to 10 times faster than Ward.
24 24 Casey Mears Just as soon as we got used to seeing the pink car, they took it away.
25 NR Robby Gordon He said that last week that he is going to drive for himself next year, and he doesn’t even need a sponsor. He’ll simply fund the team by fining himself for on-track incidents every week.
2 2 Jamie McMurray Under the old points system, he’d be sixth. If he had made the Chase, he’d be second. If he had been the one responsible for the x-measurement penalty, he’d be fired.
3 3 Jeff Gordon He's never won at Phoenix. Which means he will win there this weekend.
4 7 Mark Martin Dude, that sucked. We’d rather wait for a flu shot than sit and listen to Mark Martin be dejected after he leads 891 laps and has to settle for second. Talk about pain.
5 1 Kurt Busch Not sure what disappointed him more -- the blown engine, or the fact that Jimmy Spencer showed up on Inside Nextel Cup on Monday night.
6 5 Ryan Newman He’s the reason they don’t award points for qualifying.
7 4 Dale Earnhardt Jr. Peace out, championship.
8 10 Tony Stewart He ran a McDonald’s car in the Busch race, which means Tony knows how to eBay. Where else would he have gotten a hold of one of Andy Houston’s old firesuits?
9 13 Joe Nemechek The way he is running, kids are going to actually want to use his car the next time they play Chase for the Nextel Cup on Playstation.
10 14 Jeff Burton He probably called Dale Jr. right after the race to remind him that he didn’t drive the No. 99 Ford any more.
11 8 Rusty Wallace So he got fined $10,000 for running into Ryan Newman’s car at Martinsville. Although it really won’t be a fine, because Rusty can just get Ryan a toaster for Christmas instead of a new motorcycle, so it all evens out.
12 9 Jeremy Mayfield He needs to finish 17th this week to break the vicious cycle of a top-five followed by a bad run.
13 15 Ricky Rudd He’s scored six straight top-16 finishes, which means we’re really mad he didn’t finish 15th at Charlotte, because it sounds a lot freakin’ better when you can claim you have six straight finishes of 15th or better.
14 12 Dale Jarrett He can still catch Jamie McMurray for 11th as long as McMurray skips the last three races to focus on the Truck Series.
15 11 Elliott Sadler He’s ran into Joe Nemechek two weeks in a row. Maybe it’s Nemechek’s way of telling Sadler he didn’t appreciate him rooting for Ricky Rudd to beat Nemechek at Kansas.
16 19 Kasey Kahne Time to borrow your teammate's Flowbee.
17 21 Greg Biffle Subway’s offering a campaign where you can sign up to meet Greg Biffle. Mark Martin has entered the contest in hopes he can ask Greg about what happened on that last restart.
18 16 Matt Kenseth He said that he is going to buy a dishwasher with the $1 million he won for winning the IROC title. If he needed the money that badly, then he should have just swallowed his pride and asked Jimmie Johnson for a freebie from Lowe’s.
19 NR Carl Edwards That might have been the highest-ever finish by a driver named Carl. Actually, Carl (Edwards) set the record back in his Nextel Cup debut, when his 10th-place finish easily bested Carl Long’s 29th-place finish at Charlotte back in 2000.
20 18 Kevin Harvick Whoa. Three engine failures in four weeks. Apparently, that was a simple clerical error, because Robby was supposed to get those motors.
21 20 Michael Waltrip Mikey, you actually just might want to let ol’ DW drive the Aaron’s Dream Machine in the next Busch race, because you haven’t had a top-10 in it in the last 16 tries. Do the math.
22 NR Brian Vickers He had his career best finish on Sunday, but no one noticed.
23 22 Brendan Gaughan So now he’s rumored to be in the hunt for the No. 0 Netzero Chevrolet. We’ve already done studies on this and we’ve determined that Brendan can say “Netzero” up to 10 times faster than Ward.
24 24 Casey Mears Just as soon as we got used to seeing the pink car, they took it away.
25 NR Robby Gordon He said that last week that he is going to drive for himself next year, and he doesn’t even need a sponsor. He’ll simply fund the team by fining himself for on-track incidents every week.
