Santa Physics

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rpmallen

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Santa Physics
from: http://www.lamerkatz.com/notquake/santa_physics.shtml

1) No known species of reindeer can fly. BUT there are 300,000 species of living organisms yet to be classified, and while most of these are insects and germs, this does not COMPLETELY rule out flying reindeer which only Santa has ever seen.

2) There are 2 billion children (persons under 18) in the world. BUT since Santa doesn't (appear) to handle the Muslim, Hindu, Jewish and Buddhist children, that reduces the workload to 15% of the total - 378 million according to Population Reference Bureau. At an average (census) rate of 3.5 children per household, that's 91.8 million homes. One presumes there's at least one good child in each.

3) Santa has 31 hours of Christmas to work with, thanks to the different time zones and the rotation of the earth, assuming he travels east to west (which seems logical). This works out to 822.6 visits per second. This is to say that for each Christian household with good children, Santa has 1/1000th of a second to park, hop out of the sleigh, jump down the chimney, fill the stockings, distribute the remaining presents under the tree, eat whatever snacks have been left, get back up the chimney, get back into the sleigh and move on to the next house. Assuming that each of these 91.8 million stops are evenly distributed around the earth (which, of course, we know to be false but for the purposes of our calculations we will accept), we are now talking about .78 miles per household, a total trip of 75-1/2 million miles, not counting stops to do what most of us must do at least once every 31 hours, plus feeding and etc.

This means that Santa's sleigh is moving at 650 miles per second, 3,000 times the speed of sound. For purposes of comparison, the fastest man-made vehicle on earth, the Ulysses space probe, moves at a poky 27.4 miles per second; a conventional reindeer can run, tops, 15 miles per hour.

4) The payload on the sleigh adds another interesting element. Assuming that each child gets nothing more than a medium-sized lego set (2 pounds), the sleigh is carrying 321,300 tons, not counting Santa, who is invariably described as overweight. On land, conventional reindeer can pull no more than 300 pounds. Even granting that "flying reindeer" (see point #1) could pull TEN TIMES the normal anoint, we cannot do the job with eight, or even nine. We need 214,200 reindeer. This increases the payload - not even counting the weight of the sleigh - to 353,430 tons. Again, for comparison - this is four times the weight of the Queen Elizabeth.

5) 353,000 tons traveling at 650 miles per second creates enormous air resistance - this will heat the reindeer up in the same fashion as spacecrafts re-entering the earth's atmosphere. The lead pair of reindeer will absorb 14.3 QUINTILLION joules of energy. Per second. Each. In short, they will burst into flame almost instantaneously, exposing the reindeer behind them, and create deafening sonic booms in their wake. The entire reindeer team will be vaporized within 4.26 thousandths of a second. Santa, meanwhile, will be subjected to centrifugal forces 17,500.06 times greater than gravity. A 250-pound Santa (which seems ludicrously slim) would be pinned to the back of his sleigh by 4,315,015 pounds of force.

In conclusion - If Santa ever DID deliver presents on Christmas Eve, he's dead now.
 
So what are you?? Some kinda Scrooge?? Destroying the Santa Claus theory with simple logic and fact !!

Posters like you should be burned at the stake, tarred and feathered, placed in stocks and hung in effigy as a reminder to others who suborn this secret desire to tell anyone under eight years old there might not be a ***** *****. Thankfully there are those of us who prefer to remember the happy time when everyone beleived, protected and diligently preserved the sanctity of Santa Claus.

My grandson might read the post and actually understand the potential of Santa meeting his demise as a result of strenuous exercise stemming from his activity on the eve they are tucked in thier beds with visions of sugarplums dancing in thier innocent little heads.

BUT NOOOOOOOOOO!!

rpmallen comes along impressing us with the a vast warehouse of knowledge and disection of probability wherein Santa Claus has 1/1000th of a second to deliver gifts and thereby destroying the imaginations of hundreds, no make that thousands, no, no, make that millions of children who will awaken tomorrow morning, thier dreams shattered by this poster who feels a need to throw facts and figures at the rest of the world which proclaim such irreverent information as the post contained.
WELL, MERRY CHRISTMAS TO YOU TOO!!
I HOPE SANTA BROUGHT YOU COAL !!!!! :D

Actually, I have too much time on my hands today. Gotta get something to do.
 
I hope you are joking, Whizzer. I thought that site was rather interesting to think about if Santa did exist. And funny with it's statement about if Santa did exist, he is probably dead now. Good stuff.
 
Thats good rpmallen! I got to share it now with my friends.
 
I have seen this before and it still amuses me. But the whole point of Santa, or the basic idea that my parents told me, is that it is magical and defies all this stuff. Santa can do all this stuff because he is Santa. So no need to take it seriously. And when I first saw it a few years ago along with a younger relative, they asked me about it and I just said Santa is magically he doesn't follow the rules of physics and science.

Thanks for posting this rpm, I couldn't remember the website. Have to share it with a few friends.
 
Originally posted by rpmallen
I hope you are joking, Whizzer. I thought that site was rather interesting to think about if Santa did exist. And funny with it's statement about if Santa did exist, he is probably dead now. Good stuff.

My grandson is five and the other one is two, but they understand physics, logic and time study. They both have guaranteed enrollment at Yale, Harvard, Princeton and Cornell in 2012 and 2014. I am pushing them in the direction of Texas A&M as we are hoping for a well rounded and highest quality education as members of the Corp of Cadets, but Texas A&M university is being quite selective with early admissions and have not replied in the affirmative.

Yessssssssssss!!!!!!!!!!! I was kidding with you and I am glad if I sucked you in. I got sucked in twice within the past two weeks and find it is fun to laugh at yourself once in awhile. Both times it took me a couple of days to figure it out but finally, I did. WHOOPEEE !!! Keeps us all humble. No intent to offend with my post. As I said, I have too much time on my hands and need something to do that involves using energy via physical effort other than pressing keys on the keyboard of a computer.

This is what happens when there is no NASCAR, Busch or ASA racing going on.:D
 
I know you were joking Whizzer, I just wanted to make sure. :D

Do you think you could get my nephews guaranteed enrollment at Yale, Princeton, or Cornell?
 
whomever set up that web site has too much time on their hands. Dead Santa - Bah Humbug! I do belive, I do, I do, I do believe! :)
 
I don't believe it santa but no one had better say anything bad about the EASTER BUNNY!!!:D :D :D
 
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