Gunfighter
The young dude in the Old West wanted to be the fastest
gunfighter alive. Sitting in a saloon one night, he spotted an
old graybeard who had the reputation of having been the greatest
gunslinger of his day. The kid sidled up to the old man and told
him of his dream. The ancient legend looked him up and down and
said,
"I got a suggestion that's sure to help."
"Tell me, tell me!" said the newbie.
"Tie the bottom of your holster lower down on your leg."
"Will that make me a better gunfighter?"
"You betcha" said the old man.
The kid did as he was told, drew his gun, and neatly shot the
bow tie off the piano player.
"Wow, that really helped! Got any more suggestions?"
"Yeah: If'n you cut a notch in the top of your holster where the
hammer hits, the gun'll slide out a lot smoother."
"Will that make me a better gunfighter?"
"You betcha"
The dude did as he was told, then draw his gun and, lightning
quick, shot a cufflink off the piano player.
"This is really helping me out! Is there anything else you can
share with me?"
"One more thing," said the old-timer.
"Get that can of axle grease over there in the corner and rub it
all over your gun"
The fellow didn't hesitate and immediately started smearing the
grease on the gun barrel.
"No, no, the whole gun," said the graybeard.
"Handle and everything."
"Will that make me a better gunfighter?"
"Not likely, boy. But when Wyatt Earp gets done playing that bar
piano, he's gonna shove that gun up your ass, and this way it
won't hurt so much."
The young dude in the Old West wanted to be the fastest
gunfighter alive. Sitting in a saloon one night, he spotted an
old graybeard who had the reputation of having been the greatest
gunslinger of his day. The kid sidled up to the old man and told
him of his dream. The ancient legend looked him up and down and
said,
"I got a suggestion that's sure to help."
"Tell me, tell me!" said the newbie.
"Tie the bottom of your holster lower down on your leg."
"Will that make me a better gunfighter?"
"You betcha" said the old man.
The kid did as he was told, drew his gun, and neatly shot the
bow tie off the piano player.
"Wow, that really helped! Got any more suggestions?"
"Yeah: If'n you cut a notch in the top of your holster where the
hammer hits, the gun'll slide out a lot smoother."
"Will that make me a better gunfighter?"
"You betcha"
The dude did as he was told, then draw his gun and, lightning
quick, shot a cufflink off the piano player.
"This is really helping me out! Is there anything else you can
share with me?"
"One more thing," said the old-timer.
"Get that can of axle grease over there in the corner and rub it
all over your gun"
The fellow didn't hesitate and immediately started smearing the
grease on the gun barrel.
"No, no, the whole gun," said the graybeard.
"Handle and everything."
"Will that make me a better gunfighter?"
"Not likely, boy. But when Wyatt Earp gets done playing that bar
piano, he's gonna shove that gun up your ass, and this way it
won't hurt so much."