Whizzer
Gig'em
I know there is no way in Hades I can top the redneck sex I.Q. test posted by 97 Forever. It has been sent to nearly every corner of the globe and the results, I am happy to say, are positive. One conservative even gave it a rating as one of the five funniest jokes he ever heard.
So this is not in competition with 97Forever, he's won the prize in my book, but this one catches up to you. I found humor the first time I read it, and find every now and again I'll think of it and smile.
With the redneck sex I.Q. test, well when I think of that one I laugh, hard. The neighbors thought I was out of my mind this morning as they drove by and saw me trying to lay sod while every so often I was nearly rolling on the ground laughing.
This is my humble contribution to the humorous side of youse guys.
I found this little gem on the website of Vince Vance and the Valiants. A musical group from "who knows where" but with a great Christmas album titled, "You're All I Want For Christmas". If ya like rock (as in rock and roll) you'll like this album. It is fun to dance to in the living room as I glide my bride around the floor.
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The Lady and the Parrott and the Parrott and the Lady.
A lady was walking to work. On her way, she had to pass a pet shop. Outside the petshop was a stand with a parrot perched on it.
As she walked by the beautiful bird, she heard, "Hey lady. You're ugly."
She turned to look but saw no one. Annoyed, she huffed away to work.
On the way home that afternoon, the lady passed by the pet shop again. Again she heard the words, "Hey LADY!!! You sure are UGLY."
The lady was furious, but figured it was only a bird.
On her way to work the next morning, as she passed by the parrot, the lady was ready for a fight.
The bird said, "Hey LADY! You are ONE UGLY BROAD."
Storming into the pet shop, the lady screamed at the manager: "If you don't stop that stupid bird from calling me ugly every time I pass by, I will SUE you." And she left without another word.
That afternoon as the lady walked home from work, she noticed that the bird was still on the perch outside the pet shop. As she walked by, in a very soft voice, just loud enough to get her attention, the bird said, "Hey lady."
The lady stopped and glared at the bird, waiting to see what he would say next. And in the same quiet voice, all he said was, "You know."
So this is not in competition with 97Forever, he's won the prize in my book, but this one catches up to you. I found humor the first time I read it, and find every now and again I'll think of it and smile.
With the redneck sex I.Q. test, well when I think of that one I laugh, hard. The neighbors thought I was out of my mind this morning as they drove by and saw me trying to lay sod while every so often I was nearly rolling on the ground laughing.
This is my humble contribution to the humorous side of youse guys.
I found this little gem on the website of Vince Vance and the Valiants. A musical group from "who knows where" but with a great Christmas album titled, "You're All I Want For Christmas". If ya like rock (as in rock and roll) you'll like this album. It is fun to dance to in the living room as I glide my bride around the floor.
################################################
The Lady and the Parrott and the Parrott and the Lady.
A lady was walking to work. On her way, she had to pass a pet shop. Outside the petshop was a stand with a parrot perched on it.
As she walked by the beautiful bird, she heard, "Hey lady. You're ugly."
She turned to look but saw no one. Annoyed, she huffed away to work.
On the way home that afternoon, the lady passed by the pet shop again. Again she heard the words, "Hey LADY!!! You sure are UGLY."
The lady was furious, but figured it was only a bird.
On her way to work the next morning, as she passed by the parrot, the lady was ready for a fight.
The bird said, "Hey LADY! You are ONE UGLY BROAD."
Storming into the pet shop, the lady screamed at the manager: "If you don't stop that stupid bird from calling me ugly every time I pass by, I will SUE you." And she left without another word.
That afternoon as the lady walked home from work, she noticed that the bird was still on the perch outside the pet shop. As she walked by, in a very soft voice, just loud enough to get her attention, the bird said, "Hey lady."
The lady stopped and glared at the bird, waiting to see what he would say next. And in the same quiet voice, all he said was, "You know."
