The Witness
A small town prosecuting attorney called his first witness to the
stand in a trial - a grandmotherly, elderly woman.
He approached her and asked, "Mrs. Jones, do you know
me?"
She responded, "Why, yes, I do know you Mr. Williams. I've
known you since you were a young boy. And frankly, you've been a big disappointment to me. You lie, you cheat on your wife, you
manipulate people and talk about them behind their backs. You think you're a rising big shot when you haven't the brains to realize you never will amount to anything more than a
two-bit paper pusher. Yes, I know you.
The lawyer was stunned. Not knowing what else to do he
pointed across the room and asked, "Mrs. Williams, do you know the defense attorney?"
She replied, "Why, yes I do. I've known Mr. Bradley since he was a youngster, too. I used to baby-sit him for his parents. And he, too, has been a real disappointment to me. He's lazy, bigoted, he has a drinking problem. The man can't build a normal relationship with anyone and his law practice is one of the worst in the entire state. Not to mention he cheated on his wife with three different women. Yes, I know him."
The defense attorney was also surprised and shocked.
At this point, the judge brought the courtroom to silence
and called both counselors to the bench. In a very quiet voice,
he said with menace, "If either of you sonsabitches asks her if she knows me, you'll be jailed for contempt !!"
A small town prosecuting attorney called his first witness to the
stand in a trial - a grandmotherly, elderly woman.
He approached her and asked, "Mrs. Jones, do you know
me?"
She responded, "Why, yes, I do know you Mr. Williams. I've
known you since you were a young boy. And frankly, you've been a big disappointment to me. You lie, you cheat on your wife, you
manipulate people and talk about them behind their backs. You think you're a rising big shot when you haven't the brains to realize you never will amount to anything more than a
two-bit paper pusher. Yes, I know you.
The lawyer was stunned. Not knowing what else to do he
pointed across the room and asked, "Mrs. Williams, do you know the defense attorney?"
She replied, "Why, yes I do. I've known Mr. Bradley since he was a youngster, too. I used to baby-sit him for his parents. And he, too, has been a real disappointment to me. He's lazy, bigoted, he has a drinking problem. The man can't build a normal relationship with anyone and his law practice is one of the worst in the entire state. Not to mention he cheated on his wife with three different women. Yes, I know him."
The defense attorney was also surprised and shocked.
At this point, the judge brought the courtroom to silence
and called both counselors to the bench. In a very quiet voice,
he said with menace, "If either of you sonsabitches asks her if she knows me, you'll be jailed for contempt !!"
:thumbsup: :ROFLMFAO: :calpping: :xxrotf: 
:spiny: