Accordionated (ah kor' de on ay tid) - adj. Being able to drive and refold a road map at the same time.
Aeropalmics (ayr o palm' iks) - n. The study of wind resistance conducted by holding a cupped hand out the car window.
Agonosis (ah uh no' sis) - n. The syndrome of tuning into "Wide World of Sports" every Saturday just to watch the skier rack himself.
Bozone - n. The substance surrounding stupid people that stops bright ideas from penetrating. The bozone layer, unfortunately, shows little sign of breaking down in the near future.
Foreploy: Any misrepresentation about yourself for the purpose of getting laid.
Giraffiti: Vandalism spray-painted very, very high.
Ignoranus: A person who's both stupid and an a**hole.
Mummabolic chorus (mum uh bah' lik ko' rus) - n. When three or more people are singing along to a tune and suddenly discover they are all faking their way through the unintelligible lyrics.
Narcolepulacy (nar ko lep' ul ah see) - n. The contagious action of yawning, causing everyone in sight to also yawn.
Oreosis (awr ee oh' sis) - n. The practice of eating the cream center of an Oreo before eating the cookie outsides.
Pajangle (pah jan' gul) - n. Condition of waking up with your pajamas turned 180 degrees.
Prestofrigeration - The peculiar habit, when searching for a snack, of constantly returning to the refrigerator in hopes that something new will have materialized.
Rignition (rig ni' shun) - n. The embarrassing action of trying to start one's car with the engine already running.
Sarchasm: The gulf between the author of sarcastic wit and the person who doesn't get it.
Sark (sark) - n. The marks left on one's ankle after wearing tube socks all day.
Turfigee and Pedigee (ter' fih jee and ped' ih jee) - n. The two extreme target points of a rotary lawn sprinkler, TURFIGEE being the safest point at which to walk past, PEDIGEE being the most dangerous.
tanumbum - n. The sorry side of the Christmas tree that gets placed toward the wall.
wondracide - v. The act of mangling a piece of soft white bread with a pat of cold butter.
Aeropalmics (ayr o palm' iks) - n. The study of wind resistance conducted by holding a cupped hand out the car window.
Agonosis (ah uh no' sis) - n. The syndrome of tuning into "Wide World of Sports" every Saturday just to watch the skier rack himself.
Bozone - n. The substance surrounding stupid people that stops bright ideas from penetrating. The bozone layer, unfortunately, shows little sign of breaking down in the near future.
Foreploy: Any misrepresentation about yourself for the purpose of getting laid.
Giraffiti: Vandalism spray-painted very, very high.
Ignoranus: A person who's both stupid and an a**hole.
Mummabolic chorus (mum uh bah' lik ko' rus) - n. When three or more people are singing along to a tune and suddenly discover they are all faking their way through the unintelligible lyrics.
Narcolepulacy (nar ko lep' ul ah see) - n. The contagious action of yawning, causing everyone in sight to also yawn.
Oreosis (awr ee oh' sis) - n. The practice of eating the cream center of an Oreo before eating the cookie outsides.
Pajangle (pah jan' gul) - n. Condition of waking up with your pajamas turned 180 degrees.
Prestofrigeration - The peculiar habit, when searching for a snack, of constantly returning to the refrigerator in hopes that something new will have materialized.
Rignition (rig ni' shun) - n. The embarrassing action of trying to start one's car with the engine already running.
Sarchasm: The gulf between the author of sarcastic wit and the person who doesn't get it.
Sark (sark) - n. The marks left on one's ankle after wearing tube socks all day.
Turfigee and Pedigee (ter' fih jee and ped' ih jee) - n. The two extreme target points of a rotary lawn sprinkler, TURFIGEE being the safest point at which to walk past, PEDIGEE being the most dangerous.
tanumbum - n. The sorry side of the Christmas tree that gets placed toward the wall.
wondracide - v. The act of mangling a piece of soft white bread with a pat of cold butter.