C
Captain Coyfish
Guest
http://bleacherreport.com/articles/...0-worst-paint-schemes-in-nascar-today/page/11
On Frontstretch for fantasy picks when I came upon this article. Interesting idea for an article, but I really disagree with a lot of the pics. So I made my own list. I was origanally gonna do 10 like the article, but it was too hard to only do 10, so I did 15 instead. Enjoy
(cup only, so no pastrana)
15. #10 Go Daddy Breast Cancer Awareness
I have no issues with many teams going pink for October. Its one of the things that makes nascar unique and besides, its for a great cause. But some schemes flop, like this one. Pink and green do NOT mix by any stretch of the imagination, so this one was cursed from the start. It would get higher but its not overly complex unlike some other schemes, making it slightly refreshing.
14. #11 FedEx
Fedex had it right back when they ran the white scheme. It was simple, sharp, and clean. But when they switched to black, things started clashing. The scheme became way too complex, as FedEx tried to create a neon masterpiece. They failed. I have absolutely nothing against black schemes, but the FedEx scheme does not work in this color. Period.
13. #99 Kelloggs
Okay so I do have to give credit where credit is due and say this scheme looks way better this year than last year, likely due to the car change. But it still looks awful. Its unneedfully bright -- I have no issue with bright cars as long as they are simple (by that I mean I like Paul Menard's scheme and Carl's Subway schemes a lot) but when you try to combine this many colors together, it looks like something a 5 year old would create. Also its obnoxious to randomly have Tony the Tiger on the hood.
12. #16 Red Cross Gray
I like Biffle's Red Cross scheme that he has run in earlier years. It was sharp and simple. So why mess with a good thing? I dont know, but the Red Cross decided they want Biffle to run this fugly muddy gray scheme instead. Quite frankly there's a reason why we dont see very many gray racecars...
11. #48 Lowes/Disney's Planes
I am gonna be 100% honest here -- when Jimmie ran this scheme I was hoping for bad things to happen (to the car, not Jimmie). Why? Well one, even as a Jimmie fan I was sick of his point lead, but second of all, this scheme is so yuck. Planes looked like an exceedingly stupid movie, which is saying something in the year that brought us Epic, Smurfs 2, and Turbo, but the scheme was almost as gross. It was a dull shade of blue, with random clouds that made the car look discolored, and dont forget the stupid planes. Anyways, Jimmie did blow a tire in this race, which allowed others to take the lead for once. It was surprisingly refreshing.
10. #24 AARP "Drive to End Hunger"
Gordon has been in some sharp paint schemes this season courtesy of Cromax Pro (especially his ride for Michigan, that was one sharp car!). The Drive to End Hunger cars on the other hand...not so much. It leads us to wonder, if someone dies because they saw this scheme, therefore decreasing the amount of people that need food and leaving for more starving families, is it a good thing?
9. #24 AARP "Drive to End Hunger Action"
Remember how I said Gordon didn't have a whole lot of nice looking cars from AARP? Well this is further proof. I am actually not too sure what about this car I do not like -- it could be the rusty orange, it could be the weird shimmery paint, or it could be something else, but whatever it is it creating an eyesore. Sadly I am just getting started in terms of Gordon's schemes.
8. #2 Miller Lite
Do you remember when this scheme was first unveiled? I know I do -- the hate was nearly universal from first site. I have grown used to the scheme to a degree, but I still prefer last year's scheme by a longshot. Last year's was simple and elegant, the 2013 scheme is cluttered and messy, also coming across like they are trying to incorporate unnecessary white. Say, maybe they are.
7. #14 Mobil 1
Speaking of schemes that were far better last year, here is another. There's way too much going on, and that white Mobil 1 hood doesnt fit with the ziggity zaggity lines. Mobil 1 ran an alternate black scheme at New Hampshire -- they should have stuck with that.
6. #95
You know this was actually a great idea -- attract sponsors by making a scheme so ugly people will want their eyes freed. That has GOT to be the only logical explanation behind choosing this scheme, there's so many things going on and so many clashing colors I don't know where to start. I mean does this really need explaining?
5. #24 AARP "Drive to End Hunger" NASCAR Salutes
Told you I wasnt done talking about Gordon's awful schemes with AARP. This has my normal beefs with the standard scheme but also adds random clashing starts and a logo with random stripes in the background. I get that they were trying to be patriotic, but they tried too hard. Pity they werent the only ones with the mistake...
4. #2 Miller Lite NASCAR Salutes
Told you Gordon and team werent the only ones with NASCAR salutes scheme issues. I mean the stinkin scheme is terrifically terrible and enflames my entirely excellent eyes. Now please pardon Penske's patriotism problems with paint, and cool to Coyfish's crazy car chatter. The stripes suck, the stars are stupid, and Brad's bus is brutally busy. But the problematic patriotic paint plight of pain isnt past us at present...
3. #56 NAPA NASCAR Salutes
This very painful ugly car
Makes eyes live a just seen from far
Cause close up the camo
With purple is whamo
Onto these 2 eyes of pep-ar
2. #24 Impron Elite
Okay I heard your pleas. No more talking like a poet or worse, actual poetry. So I will just say why I dont like about this car in plain English
ITS UGLY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Okay seriously, look at it. This could be cool with out the random black on the front but it clashes so brutally with the yellow, which abruptly turns dark. I guess its proof that AARP isnt the only with ugly schemes though...
1. #16 3M Bondo/ACE
Lets be honest. You probably didnt think I would choose these for the worst schemes of 2013, or even choose more than one car. Well the reason is simple...but it isnt. I choose them because of the front -- it was just a random splotch of dark color, contrasting other wise light color in an awful way. However I really am not sure why it bothers me this much. I mean sure its bad, but it cant be as bad as Brad K's machine, you say, or the Purple-Camo hybrid. Truth is if this is about clashing colors, if this is about busy schemes, if this is about ugliness in general, then this car is the clear winner. Why? I cant think of any other scheme that incorporates 6 different colors not counting decals. Okay maybe there are a couple -- in fact I wouldnt bet on Jeff Gordon's NASCAR salutes scheme having UNDER 10. But it doesnt have the awful chunk of color -- it may be bad when spread out, but its horrendous when chunked together in one ugly mess. And I dont think cars with either of these issues could win -- in fact look at all the cars with either of thesr problerms that are ranked 2-15. And because of these combined issues, 2 of Greg's Biffles schemes suffering from simulkar issues win.
Thanks for reading guys!
Honarable mention:
(was on the list before I realized I had one too many cars)
#34-CSX "Play it Safe"
Well, this one did promote braking for trains. Which is good. But couldn't they have done with a more...err...subtle scheme? I mean not only is this rather bright, the colors are clashing like nobody's business. Trust me, I would take the message much for seriously if they ran a much more serious scheme.
On Frontstretch for fantasy picks when I came upon this article. Interesting idea for an article, but I really disagree with a lot of the pics. So I made my own list. I was origanally gonna do 10 like the article, but it was too hard to only do 10, so I did 15 instead. Enjoy
(cup only, so no pastrana)
15. #10 Go Daddy Breast Cancer Awareness
I have no issues with many teams going pink for October. Its one of the things that makes nascar unique and besides, its for a great cause. But some schemes flop, like this one. Pink and green do NOT mix by any stretch of the imagination, so this one was cursed from the start. It would get higher but its not overly complex unlike some other schemes, making it slightly refreshing.
14. #11 FedEx
Fedex had it right back when they ran the white scheme. It was simple, sharp, and clean. But when they switched to black, things started clashing. The scheme became way too complex, as FedEx tried to create a neon masterpiece. They failed. I have absolutely nothing against black schemes, but the FedEx scheme does not work in this color. Period.
13. #99 Kelloggs
Okay so I do have to give credit where credit is due and say this scheme looks way better this year than last year, likely due to the car change. But it still looks awful. Its unneedfully bright -- I have no issue with bright cars as long as they are simple (by that I mean I like Paul Menard's scheme and Carl's Subway schemes a lot) but when you try to combine this many colors together, it looks like something a 5 year old would create. Also its obnoxious to randomly have Tony the Tiger on the hood.
12. #16 Red Cross Gray
I like Biffle's Red Cross scheme that he has run in earlier years. It was sharp and simple. So why mess with a good thing? I dont know, but the Red Cross decided they want Biffle to run this fugly muddy gray scheme instead. Quite frankly there's a reason why we dont see very many gray racecars...
11. #48 Lowes/Disney's Planes
I am gonna be 100% honest here -- when Jimmie ran this scheme I was hoping for bad things to happen (to the car, not Jimmie). Why? Well one, even as a Jimmie fan I was sick of his point lead, but second of all, this scheme is so yuck. Planes looked like an exceedingly stupid movie, which is saying something in the year that brought us Epic, Smurfs 2, and Turbo, but the scheme was almost as gross. It was a dull shade of blue, with random clouds that made the car look discolored, and dont forget the stupid planes. Anyways, Jimmie did blow a tire in this race, which allowed others to take the lead for once. It was surprisingly refreshing.
10. #24 AARP "Drive to End Hunger"
Gordon has been in some sharp paint schemes this season courtesy of Cromax Pro (especially his ride for Michigan, that was one sharp car!). The Drive to End Hunger cars on the other hand...not so much. It leads us to wonder, if someone dies because they saw this scheme, therefore decreasing the amount of people that need food and leaving for more starving families, is it a good thing?
9. #24 AARP "Drive to End Hunger Action"
Remember how I said Gordon didn't have a whole lot of nice looking cars from AARP? Well this is further proof. I am actually not too sure what about this car I do not like -- it could be the rusty orange, it could be the weird shimmery paint, or it could be something else, but whatever it is it creating an eyesore. Sadly I am just getting started in terms of Gordon's schemes.
8. #2 Miller Lite
Do you remember when this scheme was first unveiled? I know I do -- the hate was nearly universal from first site. I have grown used to the scheme to a degree, but I still prefer last year's scheme by a longshot. Last year's was simple and elegant, the 2013 scheme is cluttered and messy, also coming across like they are trying to incorporate unnecessary white. Say, maybe they are.
7. #14 Mobil 1
Speaking of schemes that were far better last year, here is another. There's way too much going on, and that white Mobil 1 hood doesnt fit with the ziggity zaggity lines. Mobil 1 ran an alternate black scheme at New Hampshire -- they should have stuck with that.
6. #95
You know this was actually a great idea -- attract sponsors by making a scheme so ugly people will want their eyes freed. That has GOT to be the only logical explanation behind choosing this scheme, there's so many things going on and so many clashing colors I don't know where to start. I mean does this really need explaining?
5. #24 AARP "Drive to End Hunger" NASCAR Salutes
Told you I wasnt done talking about Gordon's awful schemes with AARP. This has my normal beefs with the standard scheme but also adds random clashing starts and a logo with random stripes in the background. I get that they were trying to be patriotic, but they tried too hard. Pity they werent the only ones with the mistake...
4. #2 Miller Lite NASCAR Salutes
Told you Gordon and team werent the only ones with NASCAR salutes scheme issues. I mean the stinkin scheme is terrifically terrible and enflames my entirely excellent eyes. Now please pardon Penske's patriotism problems with paint, and cool to Coyfish's crazy car chatter. The stripes suck, the stars are stupid, and Brad's bus is brutally busy. But the problematic patriotic paint plight of pain isnt past us at present...
3. #56 NAPA NASCAR Salutes
This very painful ugly car
Makes eyes live a just seen from far
Cause close up the camo
With purple is whamo
Onto these 2 eyes of pep-ar
2. #24 Impron Elite
Okay I heard your pleas. No more talking like a poet or worse, actual poetry. So I will just say why I dont like about this car in plain English
ITS UGLY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Okay seriously, look at it. This could be cool with out the random black on the front but it clashes so brutally with the yellow, which abruptly turns dark. I guess its proof that AARP isnt the only with ugly schemes though...
1. #16 3M Bondo/ACE
Lets be honest. You probably didnt think I would choose these for the worst schemes of 2013, or even choose more than one car. Well the reason is simple...but it isnt. I choose them because of the front -- it was just a random splotch of dark color, contrasting other wise light color in an awful way. However I really am not sure why it bothers me this much. I mean sure its bad, but it cant be as bad as Brad K's machine, you say, or the Purple-Camo hybrid. Truth is if this is about clashing colors, if this is about busy schemes, if this is about ugliness in general, then this car is the clear winner. Why? I cant think of any other scheme that incorporates 6 different colors not counting decals. Okay maybe there are a couple -- in fact I wouldnt bet on Jeff Gordon's NASCAR salutes scheme having UNDER 10. But it doesnt have the awful chunk of color -- it may be bad when spread out, but its horrendous when chunked together in one ugly mess. And I dont think cars with either of these issues could win -- in fact look at all the cars with either of thesr problerms that are ranked 2-15. And because of these combined issues, 2 of Greg's Biffles schemes suffering from simulkar issues win.
Thanks for reading guys!
Honarable mention:
(was on the list before I realized I had one too many cars)
#34-CSX "Play it Safe"
Well, this one did promote braking for trains. Which is good. But couldn't they have done with a more...err...subtle scheme? I mean not only is this rather bright, the colors are clashing like nobody's business. Trust me, I would take the message much for seriously if they ran a much more serious scheme.
