ToyYoda
Team Owner
Can't remember where this came from, but out on the internets a couple years ago there was a thing called "You Are What You Drive", which joked that you could tell everything you needed to know about a person by what they drive. I'm not much for stereotypes, but some of these are pretty funny, so I just wanted to share them:
Buick LeSabre – I am older than 34 of the 50 states.
Cadillac DeVille – I was Mary Kay’s top salesperson last year.
Cadillac Escalade – I want you to think I have more money than I actually do.
Chevrolet Blazer – My trailer park’s about a mile ahead on the left.
Chevrolet S10 – My trailer park’s about a mile ahead on the right.
Chevrolet Camaro – I enjoy beating the hell out of people.
Chevrolet Chevette – I like seeing people’s reactions when I tell them I have a ‘Vette.
Chevrolet Corsica – I have seven DUI’s.
Chevrolet Corvette – I am impotent.
Chevrolet Impala – I have to get this car back to Avis by noon tomorrow.
Chevrolet Monte Carlo – I only bought this ugly POS because Dale Earnhardt drove one.
Dodge Caravan – Don’t get behind me at the McDonald’s drive-thru, I’m gonna be awhile.
Dodge Charger – I have a family and a career, but I still wanna look like a badass.
Dodge Ram Pickup – I’ve never voted Democrat.
Ford Crown Victoria – I enjoy having people slow down to 55mph and change lanes when I come up behind them.
Ford Cargo Van – I’m either a kidnapper or a plumber.
Ford Expedition – I have 14 kids.
Ford Explorer – I shop the big and tall section at the department store.
Ford Mustang – I slow down to 85 in school zones.
Ford Taurus – Yes, I did give up on my dreams.
Ford Tempo – I bought this car with the change I found between my sofa cushions.
Geo Metro – I will start 11th Grade in the fall.
Geo Tracker – I will start 12th Grade in the fall.
Honda Accord – I lack any originality and am basically a lemming.
Honda Civic – Even though I’m in a 4-cylinder economy car, I’m pretty sure I could take you in a drag race.
Honda Element – I bought this car at a Tupperware party.
Hummer – I’m a douchebag.
Hyundai Elantra – I couldn’t afford a Corolla.
Hyundai Sonata – I couldn’t afford a Camry.
Infiniti G35 – I’m a physician with 17 malpractice suits pending.
Jaguar – I’m so rich I’ll pay $60K for a car that doesn’t run half the time.
Jeep Wrangler – I’m an outdoorsy outdoorsman who loves the outdoors. Did I mention I’m outdoorsy?
Kia Rio – This is the best car my 400 credit score would get me.
Lincoln Town Car – I live for bingo and covered dish suppers.
Mercury Grand Marquis – See Lincoln Town Car.
Mercedes 500SL - I will beat you up if you ask me for an autograph.
Mercedes 560SEL - I have a daughter named Bitsy and a son named Cole.
Mazda Miata - I do not fear being decapitated by an eighteen-wheeler.
Mitsubishi Eclipse - I delivered pizza for four years to get this car.
Nissan 350Z - I have yet to complete my divorce proceedings.
Pontiac Grand Am – This car was paid for entirely from my bartending tips.
Pontiac Trans Am - I still go to Def Leppard concerts.
Porsche 911 Turbo - I'm "compensating" for something.
Scion xB – I love my refrigerator so much, I bought a car that looks just like it.
Smart – So what if my car will fit in the back of a Prius?
Subaru Impreza WRX – Just think, for 10 grand less I coulda had a Mustang GT.
Subaru Outback – I am a woman who’s comfortable with her manhood.
Toyota Camry – See Honda Accord.
Toyota Corolla – I don’t want anyone to notice me. Ever. You never saw me.
Toyota Prius – I’ve never voted Republican.
Volkswagen Jetta – I am in the closet.
Volkswagen Cabriolet - I am out of the closet.
Volvo Wagon - I am frightened of my wife.
Sorry if I offended anyone that has one of these cars (I actually have two of them), just thought this was kinda funny
Buick LeSabre – I am older than 34 of the 50 states.
Cadillac DeVille – I was Mary Kay’s top salesperson last year.
Cadillac Escalade – I want you to think I have more money than I actually do.
Chevrolet Blazer – My trailer park’s about a mile ahead on the left.
Chevrolet S10 – My trailer park’s about a mile ahead on the right.
Chevrolet Camaro – I enjoy beating the hell out of people.
Chevrolet Chevette – I like seeing people’s reactions when I tell them I have a ‘Vette.
Chevrolet Corsica – I have seven DUI’s.
Chevrolet Corvette – I am impotent.
Chevrolet Impala – I have to get this car back to Avis by noon tomorrow.
Chevrolet Monte Carlo – I only bought this ugly POS because Dale Earnhardt drove one.
Dodge Caravan – Don’t get behind me at the McDonald’s drive-thru, I’m gonna be awhile.
Dodge Charger – I have a family and a career, but I still wanna look like a badass.
Dodge Ram Pickup – I’ve never voted Democrat.
Ford Crown Victoria – I enjoy having people slow down to 55mph and change lanes when I come up behind them.
Ford Cargo Van – I’m either a kidnapper or a plumber.
Ford Expedition – I have 14 kids.
Ford Explorer – I shop the big and tall section at the department store.
Ford Mustang – I slow down to 85 in school zones.
Ford Taurus – Yes, I did give up on my dreams.
Ford Tempo – I bought this car with the change I found between my sofa cushions.
Geo Metro – I will start 11th Grade in the fall.
Geo Tracker – I will start 12th Grade in the fall.
Honda Accord – I lack any originality and am basically a lemming.
Honda Civic – Even though I’m in a 4-cylinder economy car, I’m pretty sure I could take you in a drag race.
Honda Element – I bought this car at a Tupperware party.
Hummer – I’m a douchebag.
Hyundai Elantra – I couldn’t afford a Corolla.
Hyundai Sonata – I couldn’t afford a Camry.
Infiniti G35 – I’m a physician with 17 malpractice suits pending.
Jaguar – I’m so rich I’ll pay $60K for a car that doesn’t run half the time.
Jeep Wrangler – I’m an outdoorsy outdoorsman who loves the outdoors. Did I mention I’m outdoorsy?
Kia Rio – This is the best car my 400 credit score would get me.
Lincoln Town Car – I live for bingo and covered dish suppers.
Mercury Grand Marquis – See Lincoln Town Car.
Mercedes 500SL - I will beat you up if you ask me for an autograph.
Mercedes 560SEL - I have a daughter named Bitsy and a son named Cole.
Mazda Miata - I do not fear being decapitated by an eighteen-wheeler.
Mitsubishi Eclipse - I delivered pizza for four years to get this car.
Nissan 350Z - I have yet to complete my divorce proceedings.
Pontiac Grand Am – This car was paid for entirely from my bartending tips.
Pontiac Trans Am - I still go to Def Leppard concerts.
Porsche 911 Turbo - I'm "compensating" for something.
Scion xB – I love my refrigerator so much, I bought a car that looks just like it.
Smart – So what if my car will fit in the back of a Prius?
Subaru Impreza WRX – Just think, for 10 grand less I coulda had a Mustang GT.
Subaru Outback – I am a woman who’s comfortable with her manhood.
Toyota Camry – See Honda Accord.
Toyota Corolla – I don’t want anyone to notice me. Ever. You never saw me.
Toyota Prius – I’ve never voted Republican.
Volkswagen Jetta – I am in the closet.
Volkswagen Cabriolet - I am out of the closet.
Volvo Wagon - I am frightened of my wife.
Sorry if I offended anyone that has one of these cars (I actually have two of them), just thought this was kinda funny
